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It's happened to me a few times. This sounds dismissive, but I have found that sometimes part of it is because people are resentful of your position in the company. For example, the most trouble I had with a coworker complaining about me was a woman who'd been with the company longer than I had and I'd been promoted over her several times. There's not a lot you can really do about it except try to remain aware of people's reactions and if someone seems pissy or distant to ask them "Sorry, did I say something ignorant?

I can be insensitive sometimes, so please let me know it's the only way I'll learn! This way the next time someone complains, it's as simple as "why didn't you just tell that to her?

In some cases, if someone is acting really innapropriate, storing up recorded incidents is the only way to get the management to address the situation, but in this case, I think the way your coworker did it was entirely inappropriate. Your coworker's approach was completely unprofessional. There was nothing you could have done differently, since you weren't aware of the offense and he blindsided you and your boss in front of everyone. It's tough, but try not to take it personally. I don't think it was really about you.

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