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How to deal with liars and cheaters lady looking up friend to family

Do you often get a feeling that someone is lying to you? Or, do you find yourself wondering how to spot a liar in the first place? Perhaps you feel that some of your friends are actually being fake, and you are not sure if you can trust them?

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Unfortunately, many people start by telling one small lie, which builds up, and eventually, they find themselves ensconced in a web of lies and deceit.

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5 ways to deal with liars and cheaters

How do you put a face to infidelity? The answer is, you can't. Just as you were taught not to judge a book by its cover, it's near impossible to look someone in the eye and, in just one glance, know they're a cheater.

The truth is, anyone can be unfaithful— it just depends on how you define the term. Relationship counselor and clinical sexologist Dr. Martha Tara Lee of Eros Coaching said cheating is subjective because different people have different boundaries.

And what's most heartbreaking about these statistics is, of those who had been cheated on and found out about it, most probably never saw it coming — at least, not until it was too late. Anyone can be unfaithful, but while you shouldn't necessarily base your judgments off of the stereotypical cheats you see depicted in Hollywood, there are some common personality traits cheaters share.

If any of the following red flags are waving right in front of you, it could be a your partner's up to something.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that secrets are no fun unless you share with everyone. But not only are a cheater's secrets not fun, they're rarely shared with anyone.

A cheater's secrets can often be revealed through their recent calls list, in text messages on their phone, or a private folder in their. But a locked phone especially, Susan Winter said, is a dead giveaway. Cheaters tend to put some pretty intense privacy setting on their personal lives too, so it's not just their romantic happenings they'll keep to themselves, Winters explained.

They prefer to keep all personal details such as things about their family, who their friends are, and where they work on the DL, too. You might recall this trick of the trade from the teen dramedy "John Tucker Must Die," but apparently the three-time cheater's strategy of calling his three girlfriends "baby" and "sweetheart" wasn't just clever writing, it's a legitimate tactic cheaters use to make sure they aren't mixing up your name with their other partner's name. Winters said cheaters will latch onto cutesy nicknames like "baby" and "sweetheart" so that the odds of a slip up are in their favor.

Don't feel bad if you've ever fallen for a cheater's false promises and lame excuses for canceling plans in the past.

It's easy to do because they're eerily good at it. So good, in fact, that LeslieBeth Wish, a noted psychotherapist, author, and founder of Love Victory said cheaters will sometimes lay the groundwork for future lies ahead of time in order to cover their tracks later on in the relationship. What's even more disturbing about cheaters is that not only do they know wha t to say, they know how to say it, and how to carry themselves so that their body language doesn't give away a lie.

In the beginning of every relationship, there's a honeymoon phase when everything's coming up roses, and you can't keep your hands off each other. Eventually that all dies down, but even though you might not be showering one another with the same attention or affection that you were at the start of it all, typically some kind of spark is still burning.

But if your partner starts seeing other people behind your back, don't be surprised if the first of infidelity is distance. When you reach out, you get no reply or told they'll get right back to you — which they don't," Wish explained.

You've heard the phrase "it's not you, it's me? Nothing a cheater does is your fault, but the second they start rationalizing their affair aloud to you, it can be easy to forget they acted on their own accord. Once they start making you doubt yourself, it could be a your partner is trying to get inside your head and make it so that you blame yourself for their "needing" to cheat. Let's say you ask your ificant other about a single friend or co-worker they've been cozying up to or talking a lot with recently. Are they quick to change the subject?

If so, that's a blatant red flag your partner might be doing something suspicious. Cheaters "deflect pointed conversations by changing the true subject and always minimizing their actions," award-winning therapist and survivor of psychological abuse, Shannon Thomas told INSIDER.

Dealing with fake people: how to spot a liar and a cheat

Cheaters, like bullies, are fueled by power, and drawn to risk. This kind of behavior, however, is a reflection of something deeply rooted inside of them. World globe An icon of the world globe, indicating different international options. Get the Insider App. A leading-edge research firm focused on digital transformation.

7 traits most cheaters have in common

Julia Guerra. Cheaters like to keep their personal lives private. Cheaters will rarely, if ever, call you by name. Cheaters know how to lie, and know how to lie well.

10 things chronic cheaters do

They aren't necessarily unavailable, but they aren't exactly available, either. They tend to rationalize their behavior, despite whether it's wrong or right. A cheater's instinct is to beat around the bush if and when they're asked about the person they're cheating on you with.

Cheaters are impulsive, and can't resist taking that risk despite what it might cost them. Cheat Relationship advice Freelancer Evergreen story.