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Marriage is all about compromise seek male who like chocolate

If I could give you one piece of advice it would be this: always have a go-to karaoke song. If I could give you a second piece of advice it would be: stop saying marriage is about compromise. In graduate school, my professor for couples class told us that she hated the word compromise.

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If we come to the bargaining table expecting to compromise in relationships, we'll walk away a loser almost every time. That's because when we expect to compromise, we rarely use our imagination or go after what makes us happiest in the relationship. Nor do we ever reach a real understanding of each other and unearth what our partner truly values or what is underneath a need, desire, or goal.

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Marriage is all about communication. Marriage is all about compromise. How do they work?

The notion of marriage itself is compromise, which sounds much bleaker than it is. The path up that mountain is mighty steep, but it becomes more manageable when couples create some shared handholds. Aponte, Psy.

The first real roadblock you might hit is in finding a way to express your concerns to one another.

The importance of compromise in marriage and how do you compromise?

Each of you is willing to explain why what you want to do is important to you. Each should give the other the opportunity to express his or her preference, without interruption. The best outcome of this kind of discussion is a win-win action plan that is responsive to the stated concerns. What might those compromises look like?

Compromise is key in marriage. here’s how to do it right.

Much like planning vacations, this can be tricky, especially if there are calls to be made between several sets of immediate and extended family. From cooking to cleaning to grocery shopping to child care, this is a situation where you and your partner might want to break out another chart to make sure things are handled fairly.

Then the couple can use that list to make a fair compromise on chores. Maybe each partner takes their top two and then they randomly as the others.

Marriage is not about compromise

Socializing as a couple is different from socializing by yourself, and you might find less of an instinct to be social in a pair than you do on your own. Which parties are you going to go to?

What events will you host? How frequently?

Sometimes our partners may be unaware of our dislike of certain social events or people. But getting the balance right is a compromise that couples will have to find through trial and error.

Marriage is all about compromise

This way, both partners have expressed what they need, realized that they are coming from different sides, and meeting in the middle. Say one of you wants to go away for the weekend for a bachelor or bachelorette party, and the other is more reticent about the idea.

Fears of bad behavior? The person who disapproves should be thinking about what they would need in terms of concessions to get comfortable as opposed to just a flat no. The steps to a delicate compromise in this situation can be pretty straightforward.

In the case of money, it may be to sell something or give up a golf outing later in the season, use money that comes from a personal savings not a shared family pot or commit to taking a certain amount of cash and not charging things. Put your name to it, or whatever you feel is best.

Why you shouldn't compromise in your marriage—and what to do instead

After that, the rest is a snap. Please try again.

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Want a great marriage? don’t compromise.

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