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Earlier this month I happened to match with three very different guys on Bumble. Somehow I had caught an unlikely break at the beginning of the month.


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Online dating has revolutionised the way we interact with each other. Having to reject people, and being rejected, are even more common in the digital age. Being respectful online is as important as it is face to face, to make dating apps equally safe and enjoyable for everyone.

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Online dating has grown increasingly popular among all ages for a of reasons. Having the ability to scroll through potential matches literally anywhere as long as you have your phone is extremely convenient and saves time.

It can act as a buffer if you experience anxiety when meeting someone new face-to-face. Dating sites present hundreds of opportunities to talk with potential partners, and while this can be exciting and fun it can also lead to hurt feelings and frustration.

In reality, dating sites lead to increased exposure to rejection. It is important to engage in the online dating process with the right mindset and be prepared for the unexpected without engaging in negative self-talk. Focusing on staying positive can make online dating a fun and productive process.

Feel the emotions

Suppressing emotions can lead to them coming out in other ways that may not be healthy. Establish healthy coping strategies: vent to a friend, process your feelings with a therapist, or use them to fuel a good workout. With that being said, ask yourself if your expectations of this person are reality-based. Do you have expectations that you will be in a relationship five years from now?

One month from now? Live in the moment and have realistic expectations.

Take each unmet expectation as an opportunity to learn from it. They overgeneralize or think something is always true based on a limited of experiences or attach a label to themselves after a negative experience.

Having more choice on dating apps isn't always a good thing

These can ificantly lower your self-esteem and deter you from dating altogether. Remember that dating is one aspect of your life; it does not define you and, above all, remember to love yourself. Talking with a therapist can give you tools to help improve or maintain high self-esteem and navigate through the dating world.

Sometimes talking with an unbiased third party such as a therapist can help you to see other perspectives that may be beneficial and apply to different aspects of your life, even outside of dating. Or, find a location near you.

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