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Those are what I consider to be white lies, or "a lie about a small or unimportant matter that someone tells to avoid hurting another person," according to Merriam-Webster.

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To some, a white lie is nothing more than a reason or excuse rather than an untruth. The ethical philosophy behind telling a white lie is debated the world over by theologians and philosophers. Each individual must decide if telling a white lie is justified. If keeping someone from being hurt unduly means omitting the truth and no damage comes from the fib, then most people Reason why people lie only feel it is justified, but necessary. To Protect Feelings. Actually knowing for certain that someone is telling a lie is often impossible and the best way to get the truth is from a confession.

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Posted January 23, Reviewed by Lybi Ma. But some people get so accustomed to lying that they do so even when there is no clear purpose, and when their lies are easily disproven, leaving everyone scratching their he over the point of their deceptions. Believe it or not, their lying makes some sense, when you look at it through their eyes. The lie does matter Telling the truth feels like giving up control.

30 reasons why people lie

Often, people tell lies because they are trying to control a situation and exert influence toward getting the decisions or reactions they want. It may not feel like it to you, but people who tell lie after lie are often worried about losing the respect of those around them.

They want you to like them, be impressed, and value them.

Lies snowball. I remember a cartoon my kids watched years ago about how lies grow.

Why people lie

We tell a little bitty lie, but then to cover that lie, we have to tell another one, then another, and another — each gets bigger and bigger. When we are under pressure, our thinking about the big picture can be challenged. Our memory of things is actually quite unreliable: Multiple studies demonstrate that our memories are influenced by many things, that they change over time, and that they are essentially reconstructed each time we think about them.

Often, repetitive liars feel so much pressure in the moment that their memory becomes simply unreliable. Their memory has been overwhelmed by stresscurrent events, and their desire to find a way to make this situation work.

Sometimes, this can become so severe that the person almost seems to have created a complete alternate world in their head, one that conforms to their moment-by-moment beliefs and needs. They want it to be true.

Why do people lie? we asked an expert

Finally, the liar might want their lie to be true so badly that their desire and needs again overwhelm their instinct to tell the truth. But sometimes, liars hope that they can make something come true by saying it over and over, and by believing it as hard as they can.

People, by and large, are honest by default. Most people tell the truth most of the time.

Some people lie more than others, but even frequent liars are actually honest most of the time. But it stands out dramatically when their deceptions are so blatant, easily disproven, and seemingly unimportant. As frustrating as it is when people tell whoppers, we can begin to understand the motivations behind them. But to function effectively in the real world, we also need people to learn to be more honest.

Understanding the motivations of pathological liars.

And then, recognizing and reinforcing when a person does tell the truth is a powerful way to get more truth-telling. David J. Ley, Ph. Ley Ph. Women Who Stray. About the Author. Online: David Ley Ph. Read Next.

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